Stop needling me.

 

Cookie gets allergy shots because those 12 years in Baltimore really did a number on me. 

I had a great allergist in Baltimore with fantastic office assistants. After moving to Cleveland, I had a heck of a time finding an allergist who was accepting new patients.   When I found one, we needed to start the series of shots from the basement (Weekly) and build me back up to Monthly. 

If you get them, you appreciate someone who knows how to give them.  Done the right way, its a tiny needle, and the shot is subcutaneous, and the shot isn't painful, while the contents of the shot could interact with your body's immune response to the allergen. 

The idea is to slowly introduce a controlled amount, to build up the body's tolerance to the allergen, and thus keeping it from a histamine freakout that causes the watery eyes, the snot, the sneezing, and the coughing.  

To give the shot, and make sure it doesn't go into the muscle, they pinch the skin on the back of the arm, lifting from the muscle, and then give you the injection.  If it lands in the muscle, then either they used the wrong needle, or they drove it deep. 

A well-given allergy shot is practically unfelt. And while there may be a wee bit of discomfort afterward, it goes away.   But when the tech fucks it up, watch out.  Its a painful shot that will be a painful injection site.

Well, two weeks ago, I went in and got a tech that I had never seen before. Dressed in scrubs, a lab coat, and a surgical cap - all of which is a bit much - she called me in, barked an order at me for name and date of birth, which she insisted I tell her in front of stangers, and the hollared at me through the hall while she pulled shot tray.  All of which was off.  Normally, it's all done one on one, without broadcasting to everybody.

Then she comes in, swabs my arms in the wrong place for the shots, grabs my arm, pinches tightly and then drives the needle deep into my arm.  I yelped because it hurt like Hell.  Then she told me that it hurt because "you tensed up."  Then she repeats the process, only this time I can feel the needle being withdrawn.  And the back of my arm develops these massive welts.  I ask for some hydrocortisone cream to soothe everything back down, and she looks at me, rolls her eyes, and then scrubs cream into my arms. 

Now here's the thing, when they are done correctly, subcutaneously, there is minor discomfort for a couple hours.  But four days in my arms still hurt like a motherfucker, and I still had welts.  It was so bad, I called the doctor and asked if it hurt because the shots didn't go well or what. 

So I went back in week later for my last weekly shot, and damn it, I draw the exact same tech.  Only this time, and verily gunning for me.  I provided her with the information, even though she barked it from the hall, and when she came in with the shots, I asked her which one was the "cats" allergen is in.  

All she had to do was look at the sheet and tell me left or right.  Instead, she says, "Whatever arm it was in last week, it's in the opposite arm this week." 

I said, "I understand that, but I don't remember which arm it was last week because both shots were terribly painful."  

She looks at me.  I don't mean she looked at me, she looked through me, and said "Because you tensed up." 

And then she sets everything down, storms out, and I hear her tell someone else she can't work with me. 

So another tech who has been there forever comes in, gives both shots, and asks what went on.  I asked her to close the door, and we talked. 

I explained that I don't like being barked at for being a patient.  I said that the injections the week before hurt because they went too deep, and that I had called the doctor to tell him that.  But I also said that in the hundreds of these shots I have had since 2013, there have been three sets given to me by people who didn't seem to care what my experience was, and that I didn't want that tech giving me another shot again. 

She listened, and asked, "So what do you think caused this?" and I simply said that the tech and I don't seem to be able to work together, and that I think it would be best for her, and for me, if we didn't have to encounter one another.  And said she could make that happen. 

Frankly, I do not want to encounter her at all. She didn't respect me as a patient in a procedure, and I don't need that.  No one does.  I don't wish her any ill will, we just shouldn't work together. 

Anyway, I am happy to report that I had no problem with the shot sites later on Friday or over the weekend. 

So we'll see what happens in three weeks.